Quietly, even stealthily, Apple this week brought about that moment that many of its most loyal followers dreaded would happen: It killed off the iPod.
Godspeed, iPod. You got me through my first two years of temp jobs in LA, including one at City Hall, where I FOR SURE screwed up a lot of tax records (I lied about having accounting experience, then just winged it), many, many nights at the Wiltern or the Palladium, where I’d sneak in my earbuds while standing on a steel alleyway staircase, making sure nobody was trying to sneak into Katy Perry, and a plastic bag factory stint of almost 9 months.
I don’t know why I’m speaking to you like you are dead. You are still in my glove compartment, with whatever 160GB of music comprised my library when I last synced you.
It is weird that you are an old thing to be nostalgic about.
Hawkeye’s mugshot | Annie Wu.
THIS IS A REVENGE MOVIE PREMISE I CAN GET BEHIND
Two things everybody knows about the Joker:
1. He’s a real Frasierhead
2. He loves Frasier
Dear Brian E. Koncius,
I’m told that your client has testified under oath in a deposition that he presented a former employee of Psychopathic Records with a glass dildo, who then allegedly gave the dildo to me? There are only two possible explanations for what your client said: either he is an absolute pathological liar, who for some insane reason decided to make up a bullshit story using my name or 2: he thinks he’s a comedian and was trying to be funny. If he was joking then he’s just an asshole who isn’t funny. But if it was not 100% clear that he was attempting to make a joke, then he just lied under oath because I’ve never met your client, and if I had met your client I’d certainly remember if he tried to give me a glass fucking dildo.
The last colony of great auks lived on Geirfuglasker (the “Great Auk Rock”) off Iceland. This islet was a volcanic rock surrounded by cliffs which made it inaccessible to humans, but in 1830 the islet submerged after a volcanic eruption, and the birds moved to the nearby island of Eldey, which was accessible from a single side. When the colony was initially discovered in 1835, nearly fifty birds were present. Museums, desiring the skins of the auk for preservation and display, quickly began collecting birds from the colony.
The last pair, found incubating an egg, was killed there on 3 July 1844, on request from a merchant who wanted specimens, with Jón Brandsson and Sigurður Ísleifsson strangling the adults and Ketill Ketilsson smashing the egg with his boot. Great auk specialist John Wolley interviewed the two men who killed the last birds, and Ísleifsson described the act as follows:
"The rocks were covered with blackbirds [referring to Guillemots] and there were the Geirfugles. They walked slowly. Jón Brandsson crept up with his arms open. The bird that Jón got went into a corner but mine was going to the edge of the cliff. I caught it close to the edge – a precipice many fathoms deep. The black birds were flying off. I took him by the neck and he flapped his wings. He made no cry. I strangled him."
I have never stopped thinking about this.